The game is actually quite simple once you get the hang of it. All you need is a deck of cards, some friends to play with, and a whole lot of beer. To begin play, participants should arrange themselves in a circle around a table and appoint one player to act as the dealer for the opening round. For each additional round, the deal is passed to the player at the left of the previous dealer. Once a dealer has been chosen, he or she distributes five cards a piece to each of the players, including him or herself. Any cards left over are placed face down in a pile on the table. The player to the left of the dealer starts the round by throwing down a card. After that player has thrown a card he or she must state the sum total of the pile (see below), and pick up a new card from the pile on the table. Players are only allowed to have five cards in their possession at any one time. The next player, again to the left, throws a card and chooses another in the same fashion with play continuing in this manner until the sum total of the thrown cards equals "99". At this point is up to the next player to move the game along. If they are unable to do this the game ends and the player must drink, and when we say drink we don't mean just a sip (Ignore Disclaimer and See Below). Sound a little harsh? It is.

Of course, by now you are probably asking just how the hell you really play.

As the game is played with cards, each of the cards has a certain point value. All of the cards have their normal face value with the exception of the following "special" cards; Ten is equal to minus ten, the King is equal to ninety nine, a Four is a pass and Seven reverse the direction of play. Aces are equal to one or eleven. As we stated earlier, when a player throws a card they must state the new sum total of the pile. For example if the pile was at 53 and he or she tosses a six they must say "59". They must also announce any action, a pass, a reverse, etc., created by the use of a "special" card.

The number 99 must be reached exactly in order for the round to end. There are two ways this can be accomplished. An individual player may throw a King and set the pile at 99 automatically, or throw a card which will push the total sum of the pile to ninety nine. For example, if the pile count is up to 97 the next player must have either a two or a King to push the pile to 99. However, these are not his or her only options. The player can throw any card they passes, including the "special" cards, as long as the sum total of the pile does not go over 99. If the player does not hold a card they can use, (i.e.. a six, a three, etc.), their only option is to take a few drinks (the sip variety this time) and pass the play on to the left, (as long as the count is not at 99).

As stated before, once the pile reaches 99, the next player must move the pile along without passing or else lose the round and consume greatly. The player has a few options. They may throw a ten, thus lowering the count to 89 and sparing them a big drink. They may throw a four which passes the play along to the left, or else they may throw a seven reversing the game's direction to the right. If the player is unable to do any of these things then they are screwed and should commence drinking immediately.

The player who loses the round must drink the remainder of their beer before 99 is reached for the first time in the next game. If they are unable to do this, then in addition to finishing the one they are drinking, they must drink another entire beer before 99 is reached for the first time in the next game. This does not mean that this player has lost the following game as well, it just means that they were unable to complete their drinking obligations in the necessary amount of time. A second player can lose this subsequent game and be faced with the same punishment. In this way several players may be consuming at once, with each game and their losers being separate entities.
 

HINTS AND TID-BITS:

1. It is always a good idea to keep a "special" card in hand at all times just in case the pile comes your way with a count of 99. Playing a King to a player who has foolishly played many special cards early in the game can teach them a lesson they won't soon forget.

2. Take sips of your beer as the game moves along, this will help you if you are the unfortunate one who loses the round.

3. If a player loses around, a good way to screw them is to throw a King as an opening card. This ensures that they will be drinking more than one beer at a time. This also teaches players to drink up as they never know how many more may be piled on.

4. If players feel like being easy they can decide to change the rules a little bit. Instead of punishing the first round loser at the first 99 of the second game (if they haven't yet finished their beer), the players can decide that the players have until the complete end of the game. This would apply for all subsequent punishment and losers. This makes things easier for those players who do not have a stomach of steel. It can also keep players in the game longer.

This game can be a lot of fun for those of you who can count. With a little practice it will be you doing the screwing instead of you getting screwed.